The Cost of Peace

My Nan is remembered as being a lady who valued peace above all. She went to great lengths to maintain peace in her home between family members. She never spoke out in public in any way that would cause a rift or offense to others. As a result I imagine there were things in her life that were very frustrating for her. But she valued peace more than anything else and chose to live with the consequences of that value.

It is not an easy thing to commit to a value and then live it. Values often require of us a sacrifice of our own comfort or desires if we commit to truly living them. For Nan it meant keeping quiet about her own wishes and spending much of her time mending fences between others. For that I hold her in great respect.

We each choose the values that are most important to us. Sometimes two values come into conflict with one another. Then we have problems and struggles. When our values are in conflict with those of other people we also have conflict between individuals or groups.

Conflict is not usually pleasant. But is it always bad? Can we take something positive out of challenging or difficult situations? Absolutely. In fact, research on successful leaders indicates that they are not those who have the fewest conflicts, but are those who learn the most from their choices.

I believe that peace is important. I value honesty more. And I value excellence the most. I struggle daily in all aspects of my life to balance those values. They cannot always function together in harmony. Sometimes I have to choose which one will be honoured in a moment.

Those choices can be really hard to make and to live with. But live with them we must.

That is when it is most important to look closely at ourselves and learn from our choices (whether they were successful or mistakes). It is how we grow.