Year's End Reflections

Well another year has passed. I am a year older, a little wiser, and looking back on this past year with more regret than I usually do. In fact, I rarely look back and linger over regrets. But this holiday has been bittersweet and has pushed me towards melancholic thoughts.

It was deliciously sweet to spend time with my sisters. I haven't seen them in a year and a half. A YEAR AND A HALF, that is a long time.  Reconnecting has been lovely. We all are aging and learning to give one another more space to be ourselves, make choices that work for our own lives, and appreciate the good in one another with a lot less judgement. It makes for really wonderful time together. Plus we didn't have lots of plans made, so we were able to just go with the flow and enjoy each day for the activities we have felt like doing as each day unfolded.

On the flip side it was very difficult to discover that a neighbor, who was also our boss, died over the holidays in his house next door. My parents and LK and I hemmed and hawed about the lack of activity in the house for several days, trying not to be nosy and over-protective neighbors before calling the police to ask someone to check on him. Unfortunately it was too late and the past several days have been filled with dealing with that situation.

So how do those lead me into regrets? Well, seeing someone die completely alone made me reflect on the relationships that I have not put enough work into this year. I have had all sorts of reasons, but really I wish that I had taken more time to focus on people and building connections with loved ones. I think that is a regret that is resolution-worthy.

So, my first resolution (in many many years) is to put more time and effort into people and less into stuff.

Seeing too many people die in my life (close or peripheral) has made me regret not seizing health with both hands. I have worked really hard to build a solid base of fitness. I have held onto a foundation of that by running into December this year. I am proud of that, but regret not carrying all that work over into food as well. I eat what I want... and that usually involves way too much sugar.

So my second resolution is to change my eating habits to enable my body to live a longer, happier, stronger life with those people that are part of resolution number one.

How about you? How do you want to make 2012 better than 2011?

Auntie H

Well, the big day is done and the roller coaster of emotions that swirls around the holidays is settling down. Despite a few bumps in the road, I think that we have enjoyed a really relaxed holiday this year. And I am very thankful. We toned the "stuff" this year. We requested that extended family (other than grandparents) take us off their gift lists. We streamlined our own gift giving too. In the end it was more pleasant and helped us keep our focus on what is important this time of year; time together. I have been deeply thankful for the visit we have been enjoying with my baby sister. It has been a year and a half since we have spent time together in person. For LK and I that is a long time. For the Sprouts that is forever. They had a chance to get reacquainted with a champion auntie and have had a fabulous week. Right now when Jo finishes breakfast the first question out of his mouth is, "Can I call Auntie Hether over?" So we will revel in our lt day with Auntie H before she boards the train for the south once again.

Monday, Monday

We have all (Sprouts and grown ups alike) been striving to finish the last two weeks before the holidays strong. We made it. We are now officially on holidays. My DH pointed out no less than three times yesterday that today was to be Monday... And we didn't have to go to school. He said it with such glee in his voice each time. He really is in need of some down-time! At ten-thirty this morning he pointed out, "It's recess.". Big smile on his face.

Brrrr

The cold is here.  We went to bed last night to temperatures dropping so fast that we could feel it through the windows and curtains as a very faint chilly breeze.  BRRRR!  I love my feather duvet. 

This morning we woke up to a very cranky car (who may have appreciated being plugged in last night, had I remembered).  Some of us were snug in our beds too late (not my DH of course, he is up at the crack of dawn come hell or high water).  Thank goodness for DH's internal body clock, as his promptness is the only thing that got us out of the house this morning even close to on time.  Plus he made great lunches for everyone (which is my job in the mornings).  Have I mentioned what a great guy he is recently?

My internal body clock says its time to hibernate with warm sweaters, hot chocolate, songs around the living room, and a big pile of good books to read. 

11 more sleeps until the Christmas holidays!

Advent Anticipation

This past Saturday was the Santa Claus parade in town.  The Sprouts were thrumming with anticipation of the parade and a dinner out to celebrate.  We all enjoyed the parade a lot.  The weather was unusually warm, so nobody was in danger of frostbite (unlike our first year here).  There was a fresh few inches of snow just in time to make the world look ready for the season.  There were far more floats and creatively decorated vehicles than in previous years.  And the people standing around us were friendly.  All in all it was a very fine town parade.

So, the season has officially begun.

Nana has her decorations all up.  We have been admiring them every night.  Next weekend is the decorating weekend in our household; tree, lights, etc.  I am trying to think of creative ways to decorate the outside of the house without lights.  Hmmm...

And before we know it the holiday will be here!  Two weeks of soaking in family time and breathing deeply.  My heart longs for it with deep anticipation.

JUMPing

We have embarked on a journey into JUMP math in my classroom.  A few weeks ago, staff were asked if there were any volunteers to pilot a new math program.  And I got to participate. 

There are two of us doing the pilot on our staff, so I have a partner to wrestle over challenges with (very helpful when trying something new).  I also had a buddy with me for training on the weekend.

Four of us (the math coordinator, the math coach, and two teachers) went to the big city for two days learning about JUMP Math.  For information about the program you can hop over here. I will leave you to that yourself if you are interested (just so you know, I think it is fabulous so far).

On Monday we both dove in with two feet.

The first day was crazy and noisy.  BUT I had a student who tests out at an early first grade level for math multiplying independently!

The second day was also noisy.  We had the math coach and the math coordinator in and out of the room during the lesson offering support for students.  It was helpful, but the bodies moving in and out was also distracting.  Overall, day two was better than day one.  AND I saw another student who really struggles (and has been withdrawn for Resource full-time from math) multiplying accurately independently!

Today we waded into reading and drawing fractions.  AND they all did it beautifully.  They even drew thirds in a circle accurately (better then mine usually are) on the first try.

If this is any indication of how well laid out the instruction is going to be, I see all of my students succeeding in math this year.  What an awesome thing that will be.

Broken

FYI, Kindles don't like to be dropped.

I tried to carry a basket of laundry, a pile of books that were going away, my Kindle, and hold my son's hand (because he was feeling needy).  The Kindle slipped out of my hands and to the floor.

Not thinking much of it, I kept walking to finish the rest of the tasks in hand.

When I made it back to pick up my Kindle it looked like this....

I cried.  It is unreadable; I tried to half an hour and then gave up forlornly.  I had nothing to read.  It felt, for a brief moment, like life was over (I know, such a drama queen).

Then Monday I came home from my PD in town.  LK, the ultimate husband in the universe, greeted my with, "Your new Kindle is on its way."

Really, what more could a woman ask for?

Birthday Blues

My dearest Sproutlette turned eight last week.  She was excited to have a celebration with friends - no little brothers to bother them, and to stay up late for that celebration.  The time with friends was great.  JK was distracted by Nana for a bit after school, then his Papa kept him busy and out of the girls' hair with a new Lego to build together (major bonding time for them).

Fi had four hours of time where she was pampered with two friends.  She was very happy.

So, where do the blues come in?

At bedtime I was combing out her hair to tie up for bed.  Guess who was back?

Grrrrr!

Half an hour of painstaking combing and squishing later she was sent to bed.  And she got to dream about the fun of having her head treated again the next day instead of focusing on getting her ears pierced (which she had requested for her birthday).

Saturday morning she and I fluffed and puffed and got ready for a mother-daughter day in town (with a visit to the drug store added to the list).  We arrived at the aesthetician first thing, planning to make a piercing appointment and then do the other errands.  There was a slot so we went right in.

Forty-five minutes later we left.  No earrings.  Fi was in tears.  I was trying not to cry as well.  Both of us were frustrated.  Fi had second thoughts, then third... then tenth thoughts in the salon and we never got far enough to get beyond black marker dots on her ear lobes.  Not a great start to the day. 

It felt like her birthday was a bust.  There went her present and our bonding time together.  Because, face it, groceries is really not a bonding activity.  We did have a nice lunch out, though, so all was not lost.

The week has perked up since then.  And we have decided that we will wait another year (or three) for earrings.  Now to find a great late present...

Starving

After a week of adjusting to the time change - I have no idea why it takes them so long - the kids finally slept to a decent hour on Friday morning.  Earlier this week Fi was up at 3:15!  Crazy!!

Friday morning Jo announced to the world that he was awake with, "I need breakfast.  I am STARVING!"

Running Club

Last week on my Tuesday afternoon run home from work I picked up three buddies halfway home.  They were four-legged buddies who appeared thrilled to have someone talking to them and stopping to pet them.  As a result I had a three-dog escort almost all the way home.  They were scared off by the fiercely territorial dogs at a particular house at the Mission (neighbourhood).

Thursday I ran home again (trying to stay fit over the winter this year).  Again my same buddies picked me up for an escort home.  This time the local nurse drove by.  Thinking I was being mobbed, she wanted to help.  She dumped a Ziploc bag filled with dog food out the car window as she shouted, |Here, let me help!|  She stopped and chatted for a few minutes while the dogs ate.  This time they stuck with me through the fierce dogs and came all the way home.  We could hear them running around late into the night.  I lay there feeling bad that they were outside in the cold instead of home in their own households (although most dogs around here are outside dogs, and they probably didn#t have a warm bed waiting).  I still felt bad.

Then, when LK ran home on Friday he was the honoured recipient of the four-legged escort (although I am not sure he quite felt honoured).

This week Tuesday they were waiting.  And this time they were determined to stick to me like glue - one literally running at my heels 90% of the way.  The escort is starting to feel a bit claustrophobic, with dogs crowding my heels.  And I feel bad about bringing them far from home so often.  Plus, I am starting to think that either I have a latent dog-piper gene, or that that lovely, kind intention of the nurse to rescue me actually made the dogs think that I was going to be a food source.

But the biggest up-side is that instead of talking to myself all the way home, and looking a wee bit crazy.  Now I have someone to talk to, which makes me look a bit more sane (I hope).

More Catching Up

I know it has been forever.  I am sorry.  The Internet at home is back to SLOWER THAN DIAL-UP, which is an exercise in frustration every single time I go online.  As a result, I have done only the bare necessities of online stuff at home for the past week and a half.  Blogging just hasn't gotten high enough on the priority list.

So, the next few days are a little less busy (report cards done and handed in) and there will be some time to catch up.

But for the first catch up post...

Trick or Treat

In the car on the way to school this morning Fi piped up from the back seat, "Its too bad that Halloween isn't more than once a year."

She was thrilled to be able to wear a costume outside the house (as were a number of adults at school from the grinning faces).  She was excited about fun activities instead of hard schoolwork.  Particularly she was excited about trick or treating tonight.

A short forty-five minutes and she was tuckered out and smiling big enough to crack her cheeks. And she made a point of asking for an extra for her brother when she was at his teacher's house.

When we got home, the Little Sprout (who helped Papa man the door at the house) sighed dramatically, "I wish I went with you."

Next year, little man.  Next year.

Family Dinner

LK's class has taken on the fundraising opportunity of cooking for the school board meetings this year.  It is a chance for my spouse to share his love of cooking with his students and raise money for their end-of-year field trip.  Definitely win-win.

Due to a death in the community, the meeting that was scheduled for this evening has been post phoned.  And we were left with a great big meal for eight in the fridge and only four of us.  So, a quick holler down the road and we had dinner with Nana and Pop.

Last week Nana was the one hollering when she saw the we were done after a few really long days at school.  And we gathered around her dining room table.

In the middle of dinner the Sprouts were chatting about this and that.  Pop was listening and teasing with a twinkle in his eye.  Nana was sharing news from her day and extended family (she is my news source for the whole family for me).  My spouse was playing off Pop's teasing.  And I sat back (with the most yummy flavours in my mouth) and breathed in the happiness of it all. 

There are moments in my life that seem to slow down, just like in the movies, and give me the chance to really appreciate the joy or beauty that they contain.  I wish I could store up all this joy and sprinkle it over the whole world like fairy dust.

Yo-yo

Some days are up and some days are down.  Yesterday was up and down like a yo-yo. 

Sunday night was void of sleep because the little Sprout was up coughing for hours.  Yesterday; yo-yo chaos at school, and I reacted all day rather than dealing with the day proactively.  When I got up this morning still tired (more coughing last night) and the big Sprout was just bawling about her sore throat at breakfast I was expecting another yo-yo day today.  I was ready to stay home with her myself to avoid the yo-yo.

Instead we phoned Super-Nana and she swooped in to save the day (I love having my own personal superhero next door - everyone should have one).  With the Sprout tucked back into bed and lots of OJ in the fridge we headed off to work.

Surprise, it has been a remarkably good day.  I am not less tired.  My students had more %&&*#^@ high stakes testing to deal with (a subject for another time).  So what is it that tips a day from learning-chaos into just random chaos?  Is it me?  Is it my students?  Both, I imagine.  But what can I do to help keep us in the learning end of the continuum? 

After all I am the grown up and the buck stops here for the responsibility for learning.

Spinning

My head has been absolutely spinning with ideas and issues and questions and turmoil for the past several weeks.  Sitting down to actually formulate coherent thoughts into a decently written blog post has been attempted and aborted multiple times.  I just can't sort out my thoughts enough to narrow a topic and craft ideas to share it.  It is all a big jumble in my head.

I think that the stress of that jumble is starting to leak. 

If it wasn't dark and snowing I think the best thing would be to go for a run right now.

However, it is dark and snowing.  So I think that I will go find cosy jammies and my Kindle for a bit before bed.

Tomorrow is another day, with no mistakes in it (yet).

A Research Project

Well the time has come for some thinking ahead.  Not that we are ready to pack our bags!  Far from it.  However, as we think about the future, some changes require more advance preparation than others. 

Our next change may be several years ahead... or not.  It is in God's hands, not mine.

However, it is time to start thinking about whether or not to pursue my interest in teacher training.  Since I have moved here, I have hosted teacher candidates in my classroom and mentored several teachers.  I have really enjoyed both.  In fact, they are probably my favourite projects in my teaching career (outside daily classroom activities).  So, they might just be a good direction for my next professional learning focus.

I explored options for a Masters of Education a year and a half ago, but found that there were no Canadian universities that offered on online masters.  Since commuting isn't an option now I put the idea on hold.  There are a gagillion American ones that do, but an American masters just doesn't have the academic weight that a Canadian one does.  And I want to leave the door open for a PhD down the road if teaching teachers is the final destination...

So, I was delighted to hear from a colleague that she is looking at her masters through the university of Calgary.  All courses available online (no, we won't be moving to Calgary).  Hmmm...

Let the research begin.

Bugs 1: Me 0

So the bugs won this week.  Jo got sent home with a note about bugs (lice!!) on Wednesday.  I was told two minutes after my lunch break was over that I was to take him home right away.  Growling, I complied.  Then I spent Wednesday night doing the bedding wash/head scrub that any parent who has had experience with the critters knows.  I was doubly frustrated because I couldn't find one bug on his head.  Nary one!

Now I am a bit uptight (okay, a lot), but I was doubly cranky due to feeling miserable myself.  All I wanted to do Wednesday night was crawl into bed with a litre of hot lemon and honey.  Instead I did laundry and comb invisible critters out of my son's hair. 

For the record I am not saying that there were no bugs.  It is quite possible that there were.  I just couldn't find them.  And I know that they love to share themselves among people in classrooms where student heads are often close together.  I am actually quite amazed that this is the first time that we have had to deal with them. (Amazed that after 15 years I haven't had them).

Anyhoo, the plan was that I would take a day, as I was feeling miserable with a cold, and have the little man's head cleared by the nurse at the clinic.  Unfortunately life doesn't always go according to plan.

I woke up Thursday morning feeling beyond awful.  I barely heard LK head off to school.  Fortunately the Sprouts slept until 8:30 (actually the noisy Sprout slept until 8:30, the other one was quietly downstairs reading and eating breakfast with her father before 7).  Anyway, I got a wonderful 11 hours of sleep.  Up to make sure Sprouts had some breakfast (I hadn't heard Fi before 8:30).  Back to bed.

As the only adult in the house I did my best to stay awake and in charge.  I didn't do very well at it.  Thank heavens for Nana!  She checked in on the kids, made them lunch, and was a complete guardian angel.

At 2:30 I dragged myself out of bed, planning to drive over to the clinic and do the head check with the nurse.  Unfortunately LK had the little man's health card in his wallet at school.  And as the world was very wobbly around me I wasn't sure if it was a good plan to get behind the wheel.  So back to bed.

And then after school my sweetie snuggled up with me (figuratively since he didn't want to share my germs) and shared about his day.  He handled everything and let me sleep.  And he didn't even complain when I woke up just in time to kiss Sprouts goodnight and then curl up in front the tv for an hour.  Then it was back to bed.

However, when I chose to go into work today rather than go and get the required sick-note (necessary if you miss more than one consecutive day of work) from the nurse he was less than happy.  He grumbled about how tired I look and how awful I sound - not usually words I love to hear, but he was worried.

When I am sick it is really hard to take more than a day away from school.  A big part of me says, "Cold, shmold, you are tougher than that! If you can stand up you can teach."

Another part of me says, "It is twice as much work to get organized for a sub and they already had a sub for a day.  You might as well just grit your teeth and get through the day."

Plus I have this fear that I am not as sick as I feel and that the nurse will laugh at me and tell me that I am fine.  Stop being a wimp and get your lazy butt to work!

What I am not really hearing over those voices is my husband (who loves me and wants me to be okay) who is saying, "You are not healthy.  Stay home and get healthy.  Your family needs you more than your students or pride do."

And he is right.  There is a time to just let go of everything else.

So, I should have stayed home today.  And I should have drank another gallon of orange juice.

Hindsight 20/20.

Update (About Time, Too)

For some reason this September feels like we just moved here and are dealing with the learning curve all over again.  So many changes at school with new staff and new 'stuff' (resources/programs/ assessments up the whazoo).  And on top of it, there are some nasty germs moved into our house.  LK is sick with an unpleasant stomache flu.  The Sprouts have been coughing that loud rattley cough all night for a week.  Blech!

On the bright side, the road to town, which has been under construction all summer, is finished.  Hooray!  Now I don't dread the drive into town.  We have been avoiding any non-essential trips to town at all costs for the past two months.  It has made for an isolated time.  We have felt the remoteness of where we live quite keenly.

Losing the Battle

The Terry Fox Run was run this morning all across Canada.  On the 28th our school will join schools across the country to run in what has become a Canadian annual statement of hope.  I don't have many heroes, but Terry Fox definitely qualifies as one for me.  His determination and fierce defiance of the odds can teach all of us a huge lesson about changing the world. 

The battle against cancer has never been personal for me.  I know people who have battled cancer.  We all do.  But it hasn't been personal.

Now it is. And this year the run means much more to me. 

I have an uncle who has battled cancer for over a year now.  He was recently told that he is losing the battle.  Since then my parents, aunts, and sisters have been working hard to provide the support he needs to end his time on earth in peace and with dignity.  The heaviest load has fallen on my youngest sister, who is able to get along with anyone, loves to serve others, and has stamina to make a marathoner blush.  It has been a hard time for my parents as the news about the cancer winning the battle came just shortly after they moved up here, 2,000km away from said uncle.

Now it seems that the final days are here and my folks need to say goodbye.  So, they are working to organize their time down south to enjoy a last few days with my uncle.  Prayers would be much appreciated that this visit would be a rich blessing not only for my uncle, but also for all those who are close to him and who are saying goodbye.

And if you ran today, or are running with your students or class on the 28th... please think of those who had to fight the battle before Terry's dream came true and cancer is no longer the victor.  And if you can only support this dream through making a financial donation, please be generous.  Only with all Canadians striving together can Terry's dream come true.

Taking the Plunge

For more than five years now I have wanted to take the plunge and step outside my conservative pearls and French twist fashion identity with something substantial. Not that pearls and a French twist are bad. I just have been ready for a change.

Both body piercings and tattoos have been issues of interest for me since I was in my teens, but both were somewhat taboo as I grew up. My parents were never big fans. They never out and out banned either, but there were discussions about the permanence; what will that tattoo look like on saggy 70-year old shoulders rather than on svelte 20-year old shoulders. What is the health impact of that ink permanently inserted into your body? Will a body piercing be limiting to career choices? Will I hate it and be stuck with a hole in my nose/lip/eyebrow? Plus there were discussions about whether tattoos and body piercings were honouring our bodies as images of God (no clear answer in those discussions, just lots of questions, opinions and discussion).

In the past five years I have observed the impact of multiculturalism on both piercings and tattoos. Both are increasingly visible in Canadian women. My favourite is the nose stud that Indian women often sport. They are timeless and regal. But often those wearing them are young or in careers that are less conservative than mine. So I have restrained my impulses thinking that I was too old and in a job where it would be offensive.

However, this past year I have met two women in education with nose piercings. And then two weeks ago I ran into a lady leaving a coffee shop in town who was most definitely older than me. She had a nose piercing. It looked great on her face. I stopped her and asked about it. She has had it for 10 years and never regretted it.

So, today in town I took the plunge. I am the proud new owner of a little sparkler in my nose. And you know what? I think that it will look great with a French twist and a fab pair of heels. I might lose the pearls permanently, though.

Opening Celebrations

The opening powwow and feast are a celebration of a new school year. Each year they are a bit different. This year was the very best emotional tone for me of all those we have attended here.

I was proud of my class's behavior today. Although it was very hard for my antsy boys to be quiet and respectful while an elder opened, they were (for the most part) very quiet and respectful. After being told that they expectation at powwow was dance or watch, they all chose to do one of those. None of them complained or moaned about the heat or wanting to go play outside. And many of them danced.

I was also proud of the young men that participated from the community. Two high school students participated in the dancing as role models for the younger ones. They lead specials and called dancers in for other specials. Two others were a part of the drumming group leading the dancing. Many high school students served food carefully and faithfully, serving elders first with quiet deference.

I was really glad to be able to share the beauty of this amazing place and people today. I am richly blessed because of them.

A Lift

After my own class had all run off to catch the bus after school yesterday, one of the girls from my last year's class walked into the room.

"Hi Mrs. K. Can I visit for a few minutes?"

It lifted my spirits.

It was just a short chat with light questions about how she is adjusting to a new grade. It felt really wonderful, though to have a student want to connect for a minute.

I love my job.

Two Pops

Friday was hot dog day. For Jo is was his first hot dog day. He likes hot dogs, so I packed snacks in his lunch and a toonie for a hot dog and a bag of chips. Instead he came home with a barely opened can of iced tea. After recovering from my conniption over his not purchasing what I wanted him to (let go of those apron strings, Em) I watched him spend the entire afternoon sipping from the can of "pop". He was thrilled that he was actually able to drink "pop". (We don't generally stock it in our pantry).

This morning on the way to school he stated, out of the blue, "There are two pops. Pop the man and pop the can."

LK and I looked at each other, laughed out loud (which pleased Jo to no end), and celebrated his delightful sense of humour.

Pop the man is my dad. We call him Pop (as in Grandpop).

Pop the can... well, you are smart enough to get that one on your own.

The Night Before School

Twas the night before school and all through the house

Not a teacher was sleeping, not me nor my spouse.

The lessons were all planned, classrooms cleaned with much care

In hopes that our students would soon venture there.

I have no hopes of sleeping anytime soon. Too much excitement, and nerves. Strange to be nervous the first day of school still after so many years. I am glad that I am still nervous because I think it helps me remember how students usually feel.

I have an extra case of nerves tonight because I have so many people on my mind for whom I have great hopes of success;

• my Sprouts, one of whom is starting JK


• my dad who is leading his first shop class in this setting


• my spouse who is meeting a new group of students


• my colleagues who are new to the profession


• my colleagues who are new to the school and community


• my students


• myself

So, with all that spinning round in my head (rather than visions of sugarplums) I imagine that sleep will be a few hours off yet. I might as well make good use of the time getting lunches organized and finish setting up my gradebook.

See y'all at school!

It's A Small World

In the spring we had an adventure on a hike that took us to the train tracks and we got to meet a pair of OPP officers (who kindly informed us that the train tracks are private property). Well, this week I discovered that there is an amazing second part to the story. For the first part check back here.

We were sitting in the staff room, having lunch (a luxury of the week before school starts, that helps us all get to know one another before we dive into the trenches together). The Boss is sitting beside me and shares that our new teacher, Glee Girl, has family in K-town and that they know Laurens and I. The brother is an OPP officer. We looked at each other, a bit confused. The Boss mentions that they know us from Lakeside Church perhaps. More confusion and we wonder if it is a Treaty 3 officer because we don't know any OPP...

When we were sitting at home eating dinner that evening it struck me. The only OPP officers we have met were the ones who taught us not to play on the tracks in the spring. In fact, I thought that one of them mentioned he had a sister who was a high school English teacher in northern Quebec.

My response to his comment back in April was, "Oh, she should apply at Grassy. We are always looking for good teachers. And we will be hiring high school teachers for September as several of ours are leaving."

As it turns out, she had done so a month prior to our meeting her brother. After our meeting over the tracks he told her that there was a nice couple who lived in Grassy. And now she is our colleague.

And, as you can probably tell by her nickname, she is a huge Glee fan. I think this is a great start to a great year.

What a small world!

Pow Wow

It is pow wow weekend in Grassy. The drums started after dinner last night and were the music we all fell asleep to. They will continue for most of the weekend, and we will hang out at the pow wow grounds watching dancing, participating when we feel brave, and reconnecting with community members that we haven;t seen over the summer.

Last night Fi and I went over to watch the pageant for Princesses and Braves. She spent the evening running around reconnecting with her friends from school, many of whom she hasn't seen for most of the summer. I was delighted to see many students participating in the pageant and rooted for those who have been a part of my classes.

It was wonderful to watch so many students and note how they have grown a little or changed their haircuts. Every summer on pow wow weekend more of a coming home; to the community that is growing roots into us a little bit at a time.

Gearing Up

Another summer is coming to a close as teachers arrive back (or for their first time) here and start setting up classrooms. Many of the teachers in the elementary wing are already at work in their classrooms, and there are almost two weeks until school starts. That is an encouraging sign to me.

I went in this morning with the intent of getting some more puttering done. I didn't have a to do list or any specific project to get done, just moving forward towards being prepped for the first day.

I ended up spending the whole morning catching up with Running Goddess. You remember her; she was my running partner two years ago. Well, she had an amazing AQ experience this summer and was literally bubbling over with things she was excited about sharing from it. I know this marks me as a complete teacher-geek, but I was so thrilled about her excitement and ideas that I was a bit teary. It was also amazing to get caught up on her life and what she had been doing with herself for the summer (other than lots of learning about teaching). She is in a really good place in her life and her joy shows.

After that the rest of the day was spent puttering, connecting with other teachers and walking a few inches above the floor. The tone in the elementary wing is really positive. I am so hopeful that we will have an amazing year. I would so much appreciate prayer that this will be such a positive growing year for each of the teachers and for each of our students. We are poised on the edge of something incredible (I believe) and the possibilities are mind boggling.

The whole community is gearing up for the pow wow this weekend. There is a buzz of excitement in the air. I know that it may only be the teachers who feel that excitement in connection with the start of a new school year, but it is almost tangible.

So, to all my teacher friends out there, blessings as you gear up for a fresh new year. I hope that it will be filled to overflowing with growth and delight in the privilege of your job.

Wandering on Water

Over the past four weeks the water levels in our lakes have dropped so fast that you can almost watch it happen. It has been a dry summer, but I don't think that is the only reason the water levels are so low. Whatever the reason, there are all sorts of new things to see along the edges of the lake. The new shoreline has revealed a plethora of interesting objects such as sunken boats and the bases of beaver lodges.

We have been making the most of the lovely evenings this week by taking the canoe out after supper. The Sprouts are becoming better boat passengers, although Jo still can't remember that we stay sitting in a canoe. At some point we will tip due to his wiggling and then he will remember.

Earlier this week we had a huge list of wildlife that we had seen when we arrived home from our paddle. A beaver that lurked around the canoe while we took a close look at his dam; whose entrances were almost a foot above water level. Two families of loons with babies who dove at their parents' warning as we floated close. A mother duck with too many ducklings to keep track of, who scattered as we came closer. She did everything short of stand on her head to distract us from her flock of little ones. And great blue herons who love our lake; we see several every time we are on the water.

Last night there were a few distant loons and a beaver that we heard, but couldn't see. LK brought his camera and sat in the front of the boat trying to take pictures of all the animals that we didn't see; a somewhat frustrating endeavour. Plus he had a pairs of wiggling little ones of our own in the middle of the boat who kept the noise level high enough that critters had lots of warning to get away before he could shoot them.

Perhaps we will leave the Sprouts behind on the next trip so LK can get some good shots of the critters.

"I have blood!"

"I have blood!" Jo shrieked after a tumble on the driveway last night after supper.

Usually when he falls down he picks himself right up and reports, "I'm okay." before moving on. He is remarkably resilient that way. But when there is blood involved he freaks out completely.

So, two parents hovered over him at the sink trying to rinse out all the grit embedded into his cuts. He must have really hit hard as some of that grit was deeply embedded in the cut. LK had the brilliant idea of distracting him from his distress with Jelly Bellys. There are LK's favourite jelly bean, which we diligently hunt for every time we are in Winners (the best place to find them at a discount). Mouth full of beans, Jo submitted, not very graciously, to having his wounds cleaned somewhat.

With Mr. Men band aids on both palms he was tucked into bed. My last instructions to him were to leave the band aids alone so his boo boos could heal.

This morning he has one happy palm, well on its way to healing, and one cranky palm. The cranky palm has some grit left in the wound and is turning an ugly red. So, although the skin has started to close already, I tried to gently dig around with a needle to open it up and get the rest of the dirt out.

"That is closed already," Jo protested.

Oh, I hate having to make my kids more upset when they are hurt, but that dirt just can't stay in there. So, we sang a song to distract him from the poking. Now he has a fresh band aid and Neosporin slathered on the cut to help it heal. I hope that we got all the dirt this time.

The poor boy has new instructions this morning, "Stay out of the dirt today." Yeah, right. Like that will happen.

Fresh Breezes

Right after Oma and Opa spent a sweltering week with us the weather shifted and thundershowers and strong breezes have been blowing gorgeous weather across the skies for the past 24 hours. We spent the afternoon outside. Now I have several nasty sets of suburn lines. Why can't I remember to put sunscreen on properly? Perhaps it is time to invent a sunscreen prayer - like those tanning booths...

We also have been getting the COW (Cabin on Wheels) ready for camping. The Sprouts are thrilled to have it set up and are making the most of the extra play space.

"Mama, I am having some quiet reading time," wafted from the interior last time I stepped out onto the deck. Ah, sweet summer.

Soaking Up Family-shine

We have had a lovely visit with Oma and Opa. We celebrated birthdays, lazed in the sun, explored some of the sights of Grassy, Kenora and Winnipeg, and did a little home improvement. A perfect family visit in my book.

I love living here and am very content with where God has us right now. I think that one of the few things that I struggle with is the distance from our families. The last few days of a visit is hard because we are trying to soak up enough grandparent energy and time to last a year (without sucking them dry). And the prospect of going whole year before getting another dose is a bit of a downer. But, with all the amazing blessings in our lives, who can really complain for long. We have two sets of grandparents who love us very much and make big sacrifices to spend time with us. What more could we possibly ask for?

As we say goodbye for another year (oh that is not so fun to write) I am glad that the Sprouts have more happy memories to cherish, and some pictures (thanks Papa) to help them remember. I hope that we will be able to welcome Oma and Opa back again, as it has been wonderful to have them in our home.

Aaaand Here's Nana & Pop!! Nana? Pop?

My parents embrace life's challenges with gusto and celebrate its joys with verve. Their current move from their little log cabin in Muskoka to join us teaching here in the bush for a year is a pretty good example of facing challenges with gusto (or at least remarkable grace).

They were due to arrive here three days ago. On Wednesday we got a call saying that they were bumping the move a day so they could finish up a few last projects around the house. They are the ultimate DIYers (they have built most of the homes we lived in when I was growing up), so that meant projects like finishing flooring, trim, or staining the exterior.

That postponement was not much of a surprise to me, having lived through several Dix-style moves. Although vague, the memories are flooding back to me now. However, my husband and kids have not experiences that style of move. We are in the middle movers, rent a van, and then do the rest yourself and with friend/family labour. It has worked out pretty well. No one in my immediate family has ever done the pay packers/movers to get your stuff from A to B; we just all have other priorities for the amount of money/debt that would mean (like eating for the next sixth months after the move).

Anyway, one day postponement turned into two as the trailer they were moving all their essentials in was overloaded and needed to be repacked (with the heaviest stuff left behind). Much debate ensued regarding the wisdom of just renting a van (I voted for that one) or trimming the baggage down (that one won).

They were safely off Sunday morning with a message left on our machine saying, "See you in two days."

So last night we waited and watched the road, excited to see them (and the grownups anxious for them to be safe and sound). Instead there was a phone call.

They are stuck in T Bay. The car broke down over Lake Superior and they had a vast tow to the nearest dealership (the downside of driving a Subaru is the few dealerships). I was really impressed with how calm my mom was on the phone; two dogs and a cat in a hotel room in a strange city with a broken down car after sitting at the side of the road waiting for help for five and a half hours. I would be sobbing in a puddle on the floor. But my mom was level and sounded incredibly peaceful. She is one amazing woman!

I am praying that the car just needs a hose replaced and the that can be done in a short while this morning. But I am fearing that they will be stranded in the city for several days.

I have a fresh appreciation for the worry that my parents went through when my sisters and I left home for the first time and they were not sure We would be able to stand on our own two feet. I know that my parents can (stand on their own two feet), they have done so with remarkable grace for my whole life, I just wish that things would go smoothly for them, just this once.

And I am struggling with wanting to jump in my car and drive to rescue them. I know that won't be any help at this point, but it is what my heart is telling me to do instead of this useless waiting.

Prayers for their safe arrival would be appreciated.

Bear Scare

We were just finishing up supper and getting ready to clear the table when there was a knock on the front door. We knew it wasn't a friend, as all our friends know that we use the side door. So, curious, we went to answer it.

Two men stood on the front porch, huffing and puffing as if they had just been chased by our mama bear. But she was nowhere to be seen. There was also no car in sight. From their sunburnt skin and American accents, they were obviously not locals. Why would a pair of retired white guys be knocking on our door 80km from the nearest town without a car at dinnertime?

"Is this where the police still live?" they puffed.

"No, Treaty 3 Police have their office about 2km away. Can we help?" I answered.

As it turned out they were fishermen who have a cabin up the lake. They were huffing and puffing because they had climbed the hill from the lake (that explains why we didn't hear a car pull up). They had a problem with a bear at their cabin and needed help.

They had come back to camp after fishing for the day to find a bear in the cabin. The bear was not the least bit concerned that the cabin occupants were not looking for company, and was reluctant to move along. The next day the bear was back again. Again it was unconcerned about the humans who seemed to think it was unwelcome. After two visits in two days, the fishermen were looking for a solution.

After several phone calls to various police (jurisdiction issues???) the men had a solution; the Treaty 3 officer that was coming up today to join the group for fishing would bring his gun. If the bear dropped in uninvited again, well, it would be dinner.

Refusing offers of a beverage, off they went down the hill to launch back to camp. Today LK and I are both wondering what happened to the bear.

No Caffeine After 4 O'Clock!

I made the mistake of having a Coke with our take-out dinner last night (yes, we have take-out in GN; the chip truck). It was delicious after working all day. But the cost was lying in bed awake until after 2am. By lunchtime I anticipate a serious case of the grouchies. I hope that if I drink enough water and inject some caffeine directly into my veins it will all be okay.

Almost everything is set back to rights after finishing the painting yesterday. I am happier with the colour every time I walk into the room, and that is great as I started happy and am growing to adore it. However, I still have two plants with no home, a bathroom light cover that has lost its screw, no curtains, and no art on the walls.

While laying in bed I pondered the possibilities for the plants, art, and window treatments. Ideas, but no solutions. We shall see what today brings in terms of inspiration.

Dropping a Few Pounds

We collectively lost about 100 pounds today. Not of body weight, but stuff. LK and I spent the majority of the day purging the shed, laundry room and the storage closet. My we gather a lot of odds and ends in three years!

We have been holding onto a recalled crib (that won't be needed again in our house) and a broken piano (that we were holding onto for sentimental reasons - as we can't play the thing anymore). In the house were various small items that I bought thinking that they would somehow improve our lives, and of course, they didn't. So off they go to new homes.

LK loaded the car up with the items that were going to the dump, and I had the joyful task of taking it to the dump. Jo wanted to go with me so he could count bears, but we needed to put the seats down in order to fit big stuff in (I love my Subaru), so no passengers allowed.

At the dump I was greeted by three large adult bears. One was so delighted that I brought fresh garbage that he ambled up to the car sniffing the air. He looked like a restaurant customer anticipating a great meal.

As a distraction for him I tossed one garbage bag out the driver door and requested that he drag it away from the car so I could get rid of the rest of my load. He politely accommodated me and I madly tossed the load out of the car as fast as I could with two hands and one eye. I kept the other eye on the bears. My bear-watching eye noticed three other bears draped over tree branches around the dump, enjoying their afternoon naps.

Now the car is filled with the second load; this one destined for the Goodwill. Jo said a tearful good bye to his stroller (which he outgrew last summer) and we all are breathing easier.

I do love a good purge of junk. And it makes my new kitchen walls look even purtier!

Does that look pinkish to you?

There are a million permutations of beige. They range from vanilla bean to iced coffee to milk chocolate. Then there are the plethora of chocolate tones; milk to dark (hmm, getting hungry here).

Well, I have been itching to redecorate for three years (since we moved in here). It was not practical to redecorate as the whole house had been repainted the week before we moved in. The colour were okay (sage green and icy blue), but they really are not me; too girly.

So, with a whole summer of holidays at home we have time to repaint. Since we have lived with the colours for three years, LK can cave to my request without being completely irresponsible financially. I keep telling him how cheap paint is (compared to replacing furniture...).

So, I was loosed on the paint samples. It didn't take long to narrow my choices to one colour card. Then I discovered that I can find complementary colours through online colour tools and I was away to the races. Colour chosen, quantity calculated, and list of painting tools carefully made I went into town to make the purchase. We splurged on the primer and paint in one that is all the rage. I totally recommend it. The coverage was great. We only had to do one coat. There are a few spots for touch-ups where Sprouts brushed against the walls or the brush left strokes. But far fewer than the last time I painted (over ten years ago).

We did the whole shebang; fill holes (not with toothpaste as we did last time - college students!), sand bumps, and scrub all the walls and cupboards with TSP. My kitchen has never been cleaner. After all that prep work the painting was easy. And a reminder of how much I like painting. It was a pleasure.

Until, that is, we actually put paint on the walls. Then I was overwhelmed by self-doubt.

"It looks like it is pulling pink to me. Does it look pinkish to you?" was the first clue LK had that I wasn't sure anymore.

After several hours of analyzing the colour in various lights (in daylight it is perfect, the light reflecting off the red deck makes it look pink, and the overhead lights make it darker) my face still read not sure. My poor spouse was a little anxious. I think he was afraid that I would demand to repaint in a whole new colour. I did seriously consider it for a few minutes; the prep work was all done, it just meant another coat. Instead I decided we should live with it for a day, and then decide.

Good call. This morning I came down for breakfast and am in love with it. The kitchen is all cream in a latte with toast colours. I feels peaceful. Now I have plans to purge all the junk we have been collecting since we moved in here three years ago to prepare for painting the living room.

If you know me, you know that I would never be able to stop at just one room. The whole downstairs needs to flow in a peaceful river of yummy latte and chocolate colours. (Oh my, really hungry here).

However, the paint colour is not the problem in the living room. Its the stairs, which are open to the living room and have a 2-story ceiling at the top. How will we cut neatly cut edges all the way up there? And then that carries us upstairs...

I may not be posting for a week. Lots of painting to do...

School-Lag

Jet lag is not something I am not familiar with. I am not much of an air traveller. We do all of our travelling by car or on foot.

School-lag, on the other hand, I am very familiar with. This is the phenomenon where at the end of a school year undeniable exhaustion hits. Napping at random moments sneaks up on you. It is all too often the result of trying to cram too much work into too little time.

In university I succumbed to it after exams every May. I would arrive home to my parents' home and sleep a week away- catching up on the backlog of sleep of which I had deprived my body throughout the year. I felt it was well worth it, as I could do all the activities that I wanted to during the year and pay the piper on holidays.

Most school years now it is pretty mild. As I have matured in chronological years, I have also done a bit of maturing in time management. I have learned that paying the piper later is often heavy on interest and the level of joy I can take in activities when I am barely awake is limited. However this year blew all that out of the water. Both LK and I are seriously school-lagged.

Our weekend turned into a napfest. The Sprouts played wonderfully together, enjoying the lack of time pressure and two whole days at home (we are stretching the groceries until tomorrow). LK and I traded off napping time. While not an ideal Father's Day weekend, it was what we needed.

I think we are almost caught up and ready to enjoy our holidays. Just a few more days at work to get classrooms ship-shape and the the duckies in a row...

Another Teachable Moment

Five bla-ack bears,
Four white-tailed deer,
Three turtles,
Two ra-abbits,
A-and me i-in my-y-y car! (to the tune of The Twelve Days of Christmas)

On Tuesday evening I dashed into town for a few last minute grad items. On the way there and the way back the above song was my list of critter sightings.

The third turtle was actually at home. She was in the grass outside the house digging a hole. A turtle hole in June means eggs on the way. So, I ran inside to drag LK outside to watch her dig. Although we great big threatening-looking humans were looming around she persisted in digging one slow scoop of dirt at a time.

An hour later LK woke Fi up to come out and watch the turtle lay her eggs. It was really cool!

Yesterday we researched turtles and learned that it was a western painted turtle. She lays her eggs in May or June way up here in the northern end of her range. They will hatch at the end of August or early September. Since we are so far north the baby turtles will hibernate over the winter in the nest and emerge in the spring. We are planning to mark the nest with stakes so that we can watch for changes in the fall and then wait for the babies to emerge in the spring.

I am tempted to dig up a few eggs as a great science lesson. It would just be for Fi and Jo since school is done now. LK convinced me that it would for the best to let this teachable moment pass as an observation rather than hands-on learning.

Day 4 (belatedly)

Dredging back through a very busy week to last Thursday...

We arrived at daycare to find two other parents dragging small children away from the daycare. Not a good sign. The disgruntled expressions of the parents' faces made me sure that something was amiss.

Walking up I was not at all surprised to find that the daycare was closed. Someone broke in during the night; there was glass on the floors and the police were being waited on. So, back into the car and off to school with all three of us.

Being a wee bit sleep deprived at this point in the week/school year I did not have the wherewithal to come to the obvious solution (have Jo spend the day in JK). Instead I started creating convoluted solutions in my head that were in no way solutions, but actually created more problems. Thankfully the Boss was thinking more clearly and got right to the point.

We dropped Fi off at school and made a mad dash home to make a lunch for Jo and grab his school bag (with extra clothes in case of accidents). As I ran into the house I asked Jo to come in and grab his sweater while I made lunch. He opted to scrape squirrel poop off a neighbour's porch instead. He felt it was a higher priority at that time.

Proud of myself for not making a big deal about it, we rushed back to school in time. Everyone safely ensconced in appropriate classrooms, the day proceeded normally (at least normally for our reality).

Then right before afternoon recess the JK teacher came to find me. She was concerned the Jo had not used the washroom yet. He apparently was claiming that he only uses the washroom at home. Knowing that to be a song and dance from Jo, I followed her back to her classroom.

Jo was happily mucking about. When I asked him if he needed to pee, he said that he didn't. Then he said he needed to go in the big bathroom. So off we went.

After explaining that Mama is a girl and can't go into the boys bathroom with him (for the millionth time), he did his business and all was well. While he was inside I noticed that he had been was followed out of the classroom by a trail of curious JK students. They stood in the hall watching me wait for Jo outside the bathroom door. Nothing like an audience...

But the real news is that Papa got home before supper. We missed him SOOOO much. He got great big hugs. Super sized hugs. And I felt a great big load slip off my shoulders. Even though the Sprouts were wonderful, and I was a responsible grown up for the whole time he was gone there is nothing like knowing that your partner is there beside you, ready to handle life together.

I have no idea how single parents do it on their own. I have enormous respect for them. And I am ENORMOUSLY grateful for having LK in it with me; even if some days we are both just stumbling through the dark. At least we are stumbling together.

Day 3

This morning I came out of the bathroom after my shower to find Jo and Fi curled up in her bed.

"Mama, Fiona and I are snuggled up," Jo shared very contentedly.

A few minutes later I checked in on them again and found them both with their noses in bird field guides. This past library visit Fiona checked out all the bird field guides in the children's section of the library. (Do not ask me where this keen interest in things scientific came from; it seems to be a strange aberration LK's and my artsy genes).

For two days they have been out birdwatching in the evening.

It all began when we came home Monday to find a pile of yellow and black feathers on the driveway and a smear of critter guts on the front walk. We very cleverly deduced that something predatory had gotten a bird. But we were not sure what the bird was. We used the clues in the leftover feathers to hunt down options. The feathers were dragged to school and daycare for consultation with various experts. Fearless Leader at school thought it might be northern flicker feathers. Jo's teacher admired them with just the right amount of attention to make him feel very clever. We found the northern flicker in our field guide at home and thought that it was an excellent identification.

Then off they went; two little bird watchers.

Fiona has a little pair of "binoculars" from some toy set that don't magnify anything much, but they make her feel like a scientist. And Jo tags along after here with his own identification process; everything is a chickadee or a northern flicker to him.

Now the collection of feathers sits on the dining room table waiting for Papa to come home from his field trip so we can show him. It can join the jawbone Fi has carefully arranged for display on the side deck.

I just had a mental flash forward to a house filled with a collection of Fi's scientific finds over the next hew years; a veritable museum of her discoveries. Oh dear, what have we begun?

Day 2

Things are CRAZY at work this week. Just CRAZY. I had a realization this morning (after dumping all my own crazy on my poor sister over the phone last night; thanks for being there, chickie) about getting through the crazy. The realization? Nobody needs my drama right now.

Everyone at work (and I mean everyone) is dealing with a whole big load of crap. People are tired. People are mourning loss of family or friendships. People are preparing for major transitions in their lives. People are trying to be strong for others that they love. People are scared that someone they love may not come home. People are scared that they may not make it home.

A colleague today modelled exactly what we all need right now. She was enjoying a 'recovery day', where her students were not at school (sleeping in and recovering from their field trip yesterday) and so had a quiet room all day. She popped in just before lunch and volunteered to supervise my class at lunch so I could have a break. She did the same for another colleague, taking two classes. Now that is a servant heart!

When I expressed my thanks for her kindness, her response epitomized what I need to turn into my refrain, "Hey we're all on the same team! We gotta help each other out."

In order for everyone to get through the next two weeks at school and at home, we need to be solid. No drama. No make a bigger deal than it really is. None of it. We need to be grown ups, not divas.

On the home front things are good. I thought that I would be losing it after 24-hours without my darling spouse to share the load. But the Sprouts are truly wonderful. I can actually cook more than one dinner in a row without dropping. And as long as I am not too ambitious about tackling home improvement or cleaning projects right now, staying on top of dishes is not much harder on my own. I know that doing this on my own long term would be really hard (big kudos to single parents out there), but I am just content that we are still doing pretty darn good as day 2 comes to a close.

Day 1

LK got off safely to Thunder Bay on his great big adventure with his grade eights. They were almost bursting with excitement as they waited in the hallway to load up their gear and get on their way this morning. I can only imagine how much fun they are going to have - and how little sleep they will get.

Meanwhile, down on the homestead the Sprouts and I are making our way without our dearest Papa. So far so good. Fi was safely dropped off from her field trip shortly after 5. We all got our gear home and I got dinner underway with no meltdowns at all. Woohoo!

While cooking I was puttering in the kitchen; washing up breakfast dishes, checking Facebook, etc. The kitchen windows are open so I can hear the Sprouts outside and I was listening for the key words that mean I need to spring into action; bear, Jo did---!!!, and BEAR. I heard none of them and was enjoying the warm sunshine, leaves dancing - the whole nine yards of a gorgeous spring (almost summer) early evening.

Then I called the Sprouts in for dinner and I heard Jo say, "I need to wipe my bum."

Pardon me, I thought. Surely I didn't hear that correctly.

"What do you mean; you need to wipe your bum?" I asked, quickly getting outside to see what he was up to now.

I am sure you know. He is three. He is a boy. He seems to be under the impression the the ditch is a great place to dump all sorts of things.

After a very clearly enunciated rebuke that we do not, under any circumstances, poop in the ditch when there is a perfectly good toilet right up the stairs, we went in for supper.

I guess his mistake is understandable as he has had to stop to take care of business in the bush on a hike. He didn't seem to see the difference between the bush, way out there, and the ditch right beside our house.

He understands the difference now. And just to be sure, we went over it again while I scrubbed him in the tub after supper.

Hanging On

Nine days.

Nine days of teaching to be cheery and gracious and just keep swimming (thanks Dory)through. And then, the light at the end of a very long tunnel will burst over everything and we can slow down and smell the roses (or dandelions). It can't come soon enough.

Maybe by then the actual sun will burst through these crazy cool temperatures and going to the beach will be more than a dream.

Visions of sunny days and sparkling water are keeping me going right now.

Big Boy

The daycare was closed for the second half of the week. Usually that means trying to have Jo in the classroom with me, or taking days off to be with him at home. However, our JK teacher was very gracious in allowing him to join her class for those days. So we all packed lunches into backpacks and drove off to school on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday.

After the usual nervous "something unfamiliar" arrival, Jo quickly made friends with other children and played on the school playground with the fierce delight that he plays everywhere else.

On Friday morning he went outside before school to play with his big sister and her friends. LK was on duty and popped his head into my room on his way by to report that they were tromping about in the bush on the hill, having a grand old time.

Then on Friday he brought home a package of his "work", which he proudly shared with us. He and Fi then commences to spend a chunk of their Friday afternoon "working" together at the kitchen table.

I think that Jo is just about ready for the big transition to school.

Mama Bear

We have new neighbours; a mother bear and her only cub. They have taken up residence in the bush somewhere close to the teacherages and make an almost nightly visit to our garbage bin. At first we thought they were so cute. It is great evening entertainment to watch them wander around; especially the nightly opening of the garbage bin that she struggles through.

Clean up after her isn't great. She is such a sloppy guest, leaving garbage strewn all over the place. LK is such a curb-appeal guy that he cleans up after her every time.

The mother is gorgeous - her coat is healthy and glossy. She takes her time strolling around and lets her Little Bear explore while they walk. She is the first bear that I have ever heard talking. She grunts almost like a monkey to him quite constantly as they walk. It sounds like she is telling him everything she knows about life.

The cub is the size of a small dog and was very nervous and shy a week ago. Now he seems to have settled in and is quite comfortable cavorting around his mama's legs. He is adorable with cinnamon coloured ears and a jet-black body. If he didn't have such a fierce protector it would be totally tempting to snuggle him like a teddy bear.

Last night Mama Bear was having her evening meal in the garbage bin - she climbs right inside and the lid shuts on her. You could easily walk up to it not knowing that she was inside... Anyway, she was having her evening meal and the poor cub couldn't figure out where she was.

He cried and whined piteously. No answer. He moaned and groaned like he was dying. No answer. Finally the scared little guy went tearing off into the bush looking for his missing mama.

Well, when her tummy was full, Mama Bear climbed out of the bin and grunted to her little guy. No answer. She grumbled and groaned. No answer. Then she showed why you should never mess with a Mama Bear and ran across the clearing in a second crashing into the bush after her cub. Not even a track star could outrun her!

I think this is a neighbour that we don't want staying in the neighbourhood, as our own little bears like to play and wander outside in the evenings. Somehow I don't think that Jo and bears are a healthy combo...

15

In the first few years we were wrapped in a cocoon of newlywed bliss. We lived entirely for our relationship. We poured energy into building our new family of two with all the passion in both our souls. We were determined to build a marriage that was strong enough to withstand the struggles over money and time and the conflicts of life. They were years rich with emotional intimacy and love.

Then the honeymoon stage passed and we poured energy into building our life in our community through our work. We began to build connections with other families and establish roots to more than one another. We were blessed to know people who were chosen-family; honourable aunts, uncles, grandparents, and siblings. We are fortunate that some of those relationships are still strong to this day, even though stressed by the challenges of distance and busy lives. They were years rich with interpersonal intimacy and love.

Then we added to our family and the entire focus of our lived shifted. Now we build for our children. Every day, rain or shine, we rise and do our best so that our Sprouts will know the love of their parents and between their parents as unconditional and unreserved. These are years rich with partner intimacy and love.

It has been fifteen years of building a relationship of love. I am beyond thankful for the partner with whom I have been blessed to work. I am excited to continue to build and have adventures with my dearest husband for at least fifteen more years (hopefully fifty). I anticipate love that continues to grow rich and deeper with each year.

LK, you are my heart, my laughter, my strength, and the very best partner I could ever hope for. Thank you for building with me for these past fifteen years.

The Cost of Peace

My Nan is remembered as being a lady who valued peace above all. She went to great lengths to maintain peace in her home between family members. She never spoke out in public in any way that would cause a rift or offense to others. As a result I imagine there were things in her life that were very frustrating for her. But she valued peace more than anything else and chose to live with the consequences of that value.

It is not an easy thing to commit to a value and then live it. Values often require of us a sacrifice of our own comfort or desires if we commit to truly living them. For Nan it meant keeping quiet about her own wishes and spending much of her time mending fences between others. For that I hold her in great respect.

We each choose the values that are most important to us. Sometimes two values come into conflict with one another. Then we have problems and struggles. When our values are in conflict with those of other people we also have conflict between individuals or groups.

Conflict is not usually pleasant. But is it always bad? Can we take something positive out of challenging or difficult situations? Absolutely. In fact, research on successful leaders indicates that they are not those who have the fewest conflicts, but are those who learn the most from their choices.

I believe that peace is important. I value honesty more. And I value excellence the most. I struggle daily in all aspects of my life to balance those values. They cannot always function together in harmony. Sometimes I have to choose which one will be honoured in a moment.

Those choices can be really hard to make and to live with. But live with them we must.

That is when it is most important to look closely at ourselves and learn from our choices (whether they were successful or mistakes). It is how we grow.

Treat(y) Day

Treat Day is what Jo called it when explaining on Wednesday morning to his Nana why we were not at school. That description sounded great to me as it was a day without work that I got to spend with the Little Man.

Now that the weather is consistently lovely his constant refrain is, "Can I go play outside?" and that is often followed up by, "Mama, I want to go for a hike."

Since it was Treat(y) Day we splurged and went to for two hikes; one before lunch and one after.

As previously mentioned, Jo is not a quiet hiker. He likes to engage in a running narrative about what he sees, and what he thinks, and what he wonders (a lot like his Mama). Sometimes I feel the need to engage in his narrative and correct his grammar (jumped, not jumpded) or indicate my listening with questions. But not this time. It was lovely to just walk behind him and listen to him ramble as he explored. All he really needed was a smile and lots of patience while he stopped every ten metres or so to examine something amazing that he "discovered".

It was just both of our speed.

Mudslinging

There is a picture in my parents' photo album of my sisters and I wearing mud suits (one pieces splash-pants and jacket) in the late 1970s. We are playing outside in the mud in May. The following picture is of my face, splattered in mud. One of the other girls had thrown a handful of mud at me; literally slinging mud. I made the crankiest face possible while my mom suppressed a grin into the camera.

After supper tonight the Sprouts wanted to head right back outside to play with our little neighbour (who they are delighted to have living next door now). For about ten minutes there was blissful peace while they made mud pies and various other ditch water delicacies. Then Jo went careening into the ditch to get a shovelful of water to add to his bucket. Unfortunately he didn't quite lift his feet high enough as he stepped down the bank.

Howls of upset rose into the air and he stomped up onto the porch. He was plastered with splashes of mud from head to toe. I tried to restrain my smile as he moaned his distress. He wasn't hurt, just irate that he was wet, muddy and cold when mere moments before he was having so much fun.

I had a flashback of muddy spring days in northern BC when I was a Sprout. And I didn't envy the poor guy at all.

Three for One Deal, Not So Much of a Deal

It felt like three days.
It surely can't only be Monday done.
I am sure that there was enough stuff crammed into this day to fill at least three.

No?

Oh.

Then why am I so drained?

Three for the price of one... in sales I like those numbers. In my workday, not so much.

Let's try a one to one day tomorrow.